I recently spent time with a pastor friend, and as we caught up he began to share some of the leadership strain he’s been carrying. Several staff members were upset with him—upset enough to resign—over a leadership decision he had made. The issue was this: For the church’s vision to move from paper to reality, restructuring was necessary. And my friend, being the kind of leader churches need, didn’t avoid the hard work. He led the staff through the process carefully and intentionally. But the outcome wasn’t unanimous support. A handful of staff members had grown very comfortable with the status quo. And change threatened that comfort, so they had little interest in embracing it.
Now here’s what was really happening. My friend, as the senior leader, was thinking in terms of what would best move the church forward and fulfill her vision. A select few staff members, however, were thinking in terms of what felt most comfortable and familiar to them. So two ideologies collided. One was driven by vision fulfillment. The other was driven by personal comfort. And when those two come into conflict, leadership inevitably becomes costly. And this is why, in the title of this post, I refer to “the unenviable job of a leader.” Because when a leader makes decisions based on what he genuinely believes is best for the church, someone will almost always be disappointed. Usually, it’s those who feel the change doesn’t serve them personally.
So how do senior leaders and staff navigate this tension?
The staff members who tend to thrive—and endure—under a leader’s tenure are the ones who genuinely understand the senior leader’s role. A senior leader’s responsibility, before God and the board, is not to act in the best interest of any one individual (not even themselves), but in the best interest of the church as a whole. Of course, every senior leader would love to make decisions that keep everyone happy. But that’s rarely possible—and it’s not the job. Leadership isn’t about asking, “What will make everyone happy?” It’s about asking, “What is best for the church?” Sometimes the answer to that question will benefit you directly. Other times it won’t. Sometimes you’ll celebrate the decision. Other times you’ll feel frustrated or disappointed. But here’s what you need to remember: When a decision doesn’t go your way, it isn’t personal. It’s not about you being overlooked or undervalued. It’s about doing what’s best for the church.
And keeping that perspective changes everything. It won’t make change easy—but it will make it understandable. And it will help you navigate seasons of transition, especially the ones you wouldn’t have chosen for yourself.